Joe Alwyn for Prada

I imagine that it must be fairly tough to be a Taylor Swift boyfriend, other than the obvious perks of private planes and endless cupcakes, there is always external pressure to not be another person who breaks Tay’s heart. The Swifties will blacken your name.

Plus if you date her, she’s going to sing about you – that’s almost a given at this point. So if TS dedicates an entire song to you about being gorgeous, there is some expectation that you be .. gorgeous.

This is decidedly not gorgeous. I don’t know what Prada has done to Joe Alwyn but they’ve turned him into a serial killer with a bumbag. Is the aesthestic supposed to be Patrick Bateman for 2017? Continue reading

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Justin Bieber’s chest tattoo

It is generally my strict policy not to comment on people’s bodies on here (and particularly surgeries) but tattoos are fair game. Especially tattoos of Chinese characters. I reserve the right to mock those until the end of time.

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The Biebs has been exceptionally quiet lately, but I suppose he missed the attention because he’s reared up to show the world his brand new torso tatt. Let’s get a better look at it: Continue reading

Michelle Obama loves Bruno Mars

It’s been an absolutely brutal week for everyone, so do you need a small spirit lift? How about Michelle Obama being adorable with Bruno Mars?

Let me count the things I adore about this photo.

1) Michelle Obama. I’m so taken with how happy she looks. When was the last time you saw her smile like that? Although I am fairly sure that I smiled like that when I was at his concert. He just has the most amazing energy when he performs.

2) She’s carrying a personalised sweatshirt. Aww, he made it just for her.

3) Bruno Mars is the king of the poses. But we all knew this already.

4) Bruno Mars’ dimple has broken so many hearts and will probably continue to do so in the near future.

Lastly, I love that the First Lady loves Bruno Mars, which song do you think is her favourite? I could really see her belting out Grenade or Uptown Funk. No-one can resist Uptown Funk.

#Squad

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Britney back on form

I’m sure none of us need reminding but it was really touch and go for Brit there in her twenties. Guys, look at her. Our Brit is loving life in her thirties. She can cartwheel, walk on her hands, double and back flip. I’m astounded. And lest you pish me over this, I’d like to see your videos where you can do better!

Indiana Jones, Sarah Connor and Laurie Strode are returning, because you asked so nicely.

If you watched the GQ video of Harrison Ford that I posted the other day, it starts off with Harrison being asked “Do you have the intention of rebooting every successful franchise you’ve ever done?”

And he says “You bet your ass I am. It’s a living.” God, I love him. Never leave me Harrison.

And he probably never will, because the wheels are in motion for him to be in Indiana Jones 5 with Stephen Spielberg directing for a 2020 release date. I honestly don’t want this movie to happen, because frankly I would be heartbroken if he hurt himself doing one of those crazy stunts.  He’s 75, let him sit in a lounge chair for a while, geez. If he’s going to reboot something, make it something where he doesn’t have to move so much like .. Regarding Henry or ..Working Girl? Continue reading

Kevin Hart: These are my confessions

There has been talk for some time that Kevin Hart has been stepping out on his pregnant wife, and now there is definitive proof in an Instagram confession of all things. Kevin Hart was being blackmailed over a sex tape, and he’s decided to fess up rather than pay this person the money. I somehow don’t think this will affect his reputation too much (look at Chris Rock and Kerry Washington), but then again he does have 54m followers who might not be that forgiving. I have been wrong before about these things.

I was watching the Dave Chappelle Netflix special with my friends over the weekend and in it, Dave describes how someone attempted to extort him by sending a VHS of him having sex with someone. Lucky for Dave, it was filmed before he was married, so his wife couldn’t stay mad for that long. Coincidentally, Kevin and Dave are friends, and KHart is mentioned on the Netflix special in an anecdote as well. What are the odds of this kind of thing happening to two buddies? Is there a Hollywood sex-tape-blackmail-ring that I don’t know about?

Jared Leto on the cover on W Magazine

Ever since Jared Leto took on the role of the Joker, people have been in full-Leto backlash. They don’t like his acting, they don’t like his band, and they especially hate his fashion sense. I would have thought that there would be at least some residual love for Jordan Catalano, but alas, we are all incredibly fickle and poor Jared is on the ban list.

Thx for having me @wmag @mario_sorrenti @gucci 🕺🏻🕺🏻🕺🏻

A post shared by JARED LETO (@jaredleto) on

This doesn’t help. There’s just something about it that’s not coming together. I think it’s the beard. Jared Leto is a very good looking man (those eyes!), but there’s something so odd about this very fashion forward clothing mixed with that amount of facial hair. It screams LOOK AT ME but actually.. DON’T LOOK AT ME. The beard hides the face but the clothing says I would like to continue to be in the spotlight.

Am I right about this? Do you have a different take on what Jared is trying to do?