John Heard, Macaulay Culkin and some random thoughts

Coincidentally, I’ve been thinking about John Heard a lot lately. I’ve been on a 90s film binge and he delightfully showed up in both The Pelican Brief and Awakenings. It’s that brief, warm recognition of “Hey! That’s Kevin McAllister’s Dad!”. John Heard will always to me, be the seminal dad from the Home Alone series. Probably if they didn’t have so many kids, they wouldn’t have lost count of Kevin completely twice. Those movies are a lesson in contraception and overpopulation. It’s also on some level, a child wish-fulfilment fantasy, what child doesn’t want to torture a bunch of adults who are stopping them from running wild? RIP John Heard, you were a bright spot in a sea of 90s movies and we millennials thank you for the memories.

Speaking of Macaulay Culkin, I was walking  with a friend today, when he stopped and pointed out his old apartment. Apparently my friend and Macaulay were poker buddies. I don’t know why this flustered me so much, on one hand, MC has to live somewhere. And on the other, he seems to dislike everything about Home Alone so why would he choose New York as a home base? Do you think he actively avoids going to the Plaza? The internet tells me that he did give up New York for Paris anyway, so maybe he was sick of people asking him to quote “I made my family disappear!”

I asked my friend what he was like. “Oh, he’s a nice guy. Down to earth.” That wasn’t the answer I expected, we should all be glad that the kid turned out alright in the end.


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